You know those mornings when you wake up before the alarm, and the windows are still cloaked in cool nighttime colors? This is one of those mornings. Yesterday was almost one--I woke up before my alarm, but then I succumbed to exhaustion and closed my eyes again. That's the fatal mistake. It sets you up … Continue reading Gratitude and un-Gratitude: August
Author: sbuckleit
On Having a Boy
From the time I was sixteen, I pictured having a daughter. Somehow it had never occurred to me that I might have a boy--it just didn’t seem like an option. Boys were for people who had brothers growing up. I have a sister. When I used to ask my mom whether she’d wanted girls or … Continue reading On Having a Boy
On Minor Miracles
I’m sitting at our old wooden table right now. There are wine stains on it, and flour has been permanently scoured into its surface. The cats use its legs as scratching posts. This table had a generic start: in an Ikea store in Minneapolis, but over the years it has collected memories. I kneaded my … Continue reading On Minor Miracles
On Large Dogs in Small Apartments
Working at a humane society, I often come across the notion that a large dog can’t live in a small apartment. “Oh, we certainly don’t have room for a dog that size,” the person will say, eyes roving disapprovingly over a Labrador mix of medium stature. Having personally housed a 90 lb Great Dane/Labrador/husky mix … Continue reading On Large Dogs in Small Apartments
On Luck and Loss
Right now I’m sitting on the couch with the window flung wide open, listening to the symphony of frogs that has congregated outside. It’s been unseasonably wet and warm. In the span of a week, we went from frozen soil and brown, withered plants to green unfurling everywhere. And best of all are the spring … Continue reading On Luck and Loss
On Goodbyes
I am sad. It pours out of me in gasps and chokes, a geyser of emotion too strong to stopper up. Each year it lies in wait. Quiet, tame. Masked by boredom with the details, the mundanity of every day life. And then, as his tires crunch gravel outside the window, and the door closes solidly … Continue reading On Goodbyes
The Merits of Being Alone
Alone. It's a weighty concept, one packed with loneliness and independence and freedom. It means handling problems that arise all by yourself. Bearing life's weight on your own back. But with that independence comes freedom from another person's opinions and needs. It means living your life exactly the way you want to live it, unrestrained … Continue reading The Merits of Being Alone
On Change
Spring is wrapping up here in Mississippi. Now when I step onto the deck each morning with Chara, the air is as warm and soft as a second skin. The brilliant spring blooms have faded, and the garden is well established. And with these changes come other big life changes. About three weeks ago … Continue reading On Change
On Money Matters
Talking about money can be awkward. But I think it's important too, so I'm just going to dive right into it: Jordan and I are poor. He's a graduate student with a meager stipend, and I work for a non-profit. In the last few months, we've had a huge shift in how we think about … Continue reading On Money Matters
On Moodiness
Yesterday, Jordan and I got into a fight. I'm sharing this because it's an important reality of our relationship. We aren't perfect. We are messy, we are human. But it's easy to come off as perfect when you write pieces about the beautiful little moments together. The fight started with me, before even I could have guessed … Continue reading On Moodiness